How To Beat The DHS Railroad Job, Part I - The Entry

Hey kids, and welcome to your first lesson in how to handle your first...and hopefully last DHS involvement in your lives.  This is an excellent manual for newcomers to the DHS experience (and what an illuminating experience it is too, right?), as well as a good brush-up on the many Gestapo-type tactics that DHS uses to supposedly "Reunify" your falsely accused family, whilst all the while really just trying to find out everything they can use to rip your families apart...permanently.  Please, wiper yer feet, grab some popcorn, pull up a chair, and just enjoy the show, OK?

Now the primary purpose for this post is not meant for the people who are truly doing wrong.  It's true focus will, of course, be not only for those of you who are being WRONGED by DHS, like I am, but will also be for the other flip-side purpose of information; to inform and educate those who have no clue what's going on in our fair and supposedly "free" country.  I suppose you could also say that the other purpose of this post is to piss off all of those who would try and separate us from our baby.  May you all sleep like S*** and eventually burn in Hell for your crimes.

Here's what I love most.  Anybody...and I mean ANYBODY...family, friends, strangers, drug dealers, drug users, jealous and envious gun-nuts....ANYONE can call DHS with allegations, about anything, and get them out to your door.  It obviously doesn't ever have to include grounds, proof, basis....anything.  I could call them on President Obama, if I wanted to, and they would, according to them, check it out.  I doubt that seriously...I'm sure there are certain qualifications to an investigation, such as non-politically motivated, poorer than it takes to rent an attorney for more than a month, interacial probably helps a great deal; and you shouldn't be doing any kind of job that would involve too much media attention.  If you pass that, you should be good enough to expect DHS at your door, no problem.

This will probably be the most important thing you have to know about a visit from your local DHS office (whose sole purpose, of course, is to make sure you aren't doing terrible things in your home that might endanger your children...whether you're actually doing anything wrong or not), more important than just about ANYTHING you could ever know.  DHS is your state government a-calling...this department of our state government, contrary to popular belief, is NOT above the law, any more than a normal police officer is.  There are definite restrictions and guidelines that these folks MUST follow, regardless of race, color, creed, origin, sex or religion.  They have a lot of Government-given powers, make no mistake, but there's one thing that a lot of people DON'T know...and that is that DHS, as powerful as they might be...has no more right to get their foot in the door than anyone else.  Oh, make no mistake, once they DO manage to get their foot in the door, you might as well kiss your ass goodbye, because then it's too late.  The trick is to never let them get by you in the first place.  Let me say that again, big and bold, to make sure you take it to heart, OK?

YOU NEVER HAVE TO LET THESE PEOPLE THROUGH YOUR DOOR.

Oh, they're a tricky bunch, they are, they are.  Make no mistake, they have Gestapo-like scare tactics, meant to frighten you into thinking you have to let them in...but you don't.  Ever.  Let me draw this out for you, so you're aware of the danger you might face, shoulds't you fall for this, as well as how you can loop around them, and make them back off and more than likely regroup, more sure of themselves as ever; then return with a more aggressive tactic....but alas, to no avail; for education is key here kiddies, and if you are informed, you are like a derelict with a pit-bull on a chain...impossible to even approach.  Here's how it's likely to go, and why these "tactics" won't work on you, Mr. Joe Average.

They knock on your door.  You open the door to two strange people, generally women, who are loaded down with papers they need to fill out, speaking of strangers or of people close to you who have called in a complaint of you doing drugs in your home, that you don't know how to take care of your children, of child abandonment or neglect...could be any number of things.  They'd like to talk with you, concerning these allegations.  You say "Sure, come on in"?  Then you might as well just have a big sign above you that says "Take my kids...PLEASE!!", because now you have "opened the door" as it were to falsifications, embellishments, and fairy tales, concerning your parenting skills, your drug use...whatever it is that they believe is going on, or has been said to be going on.

However, it's as simple as this...Just say no.  No, you're not allowed to come in.  No, I don't believe I'm going to be letting you in on this particularly sunny happy day...or, even a big, LOUD, NOOOOO!!  will do the trick, followed quickly by a rather indignant door slam.  Just like the police, DHS cannot enter your home without justifiable cause or proof of something, or without a court order to do so.  If they do not have a signed court order, they don't even have the right to tickle your doormat or dirty up your driveway, let alone come into your home...for any reason.  Oh, they'll SAY they left and got one.  They'll say the judge said you could come in...they may even beg or suggest that things will be easier for you, and they'll be quick to get out of your lives if you choose to cooperate...but it's all a ruse.  DO NOT ALLOW THESE ASSHOLES INTO YOUR HOMES, OR YOU MAY AS WELL MAKE UP THE GUEST ROOM, BECAUSE THEY WILL MOVE IN; and like that relative who came down for a vacation and doesn't leave for months, DHS will take over your lives, and that life will never, EVER be the same.  The simple solution.  DON'T.  LET.  THEM. COME.  IN.

Not unlike a situation with the police, do NOT open your door in order to deal with DHS.  Like the police, and in any situation involving DHS or the police, it's been known to be ruled that an open door, whether you're blocking the doorway or not, is an open invitation to come in on the part of the home owner.  Keep the door closed, and they can neither see anything in your home, nor can they come in, unless they have a court order.

Oh, they'll try all the tricks they can to get in.  Here's a few that they might pull:

1.  "I'll get a court order!"  First of all, court orders aren't just printed out like money (good reference, right?), they have to be backed by something...although, I do have to say, that mine had no basis...and was signed by a judge (?) anyway...but that was also AFTER DHS got their foot in the door, and made up stuff to get what they wanted.  Poor things, just like the police, it's kind of a catch 22 for DHS.  They wanna get in.  To get in, they need a judge's order to be able to come in, or be let in.  In order for a judge to sign an order, they have to have proof to get in, which, unfortunately, involves them getting in to verify what they've been told is happening.  What it all comes down to is this:  Without a court order, they can't get in...and they can't get a court order until they get in to get what they need for the court order.  So let them threaten to get a court order all they like.  It's likely, as well as almost guaranteed that they'll never get one, because no judge is gonna be stupid enough to issue one without real proof.  Not in EVERY case, which is why I have such a good case.  Don't believe it.  They ain't getting one.

2.  (They leave, then come back oh so long and say) "I have a court order", and will more than likely show you one, that might just looked like it's signed.  Remember, they need to get in....DESPERATELY.  I wouldn't doubt that this trick has been done...and gotten away with, many times.  Don't fall for it.  Ask for it to be held up to the peephole so you can inspect it, without opening your door.

3.  "I'm calling the police, and they'll let me in."  Let 'em.  They're human American Citizens, just like everyone else, and without legal proof of their allegations, they can't come in any more with an officer present.  The same rules apply (please see above).

4.  I actually have heard of both of these things happening.  They go right from the front door, to the back door, where, if you're standing at the front door guarding against them, they're likely to get another family member at the back door to let them in, should they knock or ring the bell.  As soon as you see them at your front door, make sure to call all of your kids in, so you know where they are...as well as your husband.  Another trick they will try is to wait a half an hour and come back again, hoping to get someone else to answer the door.  As soon as you know they are trying to come into your life, make sure and inform your entire family to neither open the door to them, or answer a land-line phone and talk to them.  Conversations are just as easily made into proof a judge could use to sign an order.

Tomorrow, we'll cover what happens when it's too late, and someone let them in.  We'll go over the things that they will do, as well as what you can do once they're in.