The American Consumer - Part IV - Menagerie!

http://www.npr.org/blogs/thesalt/2012/07/11/156625861/wake-up-call-to-grocery-stores-young-people-shop-around

Hey America!  Sorry 'bout the short break, I had to really reach to get some ideas this week, but I think I might have come up with a doozie or two.

Sooooooo......it was my decision that I would include one good post per night over the weekend, in emulation of a political runway, then shift into 5th gear come Monday. I'm gonna drive this one right on out there, then hammer out the next during the day tomorrow, then another for Sunday, daytime as well.  Our story today is one that I had intended to start a whole blog on...the American Consumer (and his/her little issues on and in today's world).  Once ADS kicked in and started collecting 10's of follows a day, however, then snowballed; time didn't quite allow me to add to it, so I abandoned it and wrapped it into this one.

We're gonna try something a bit different with this one though.  This one's gonna be a mini-collection of a bunch o' different beefs, probably one for just about every industry.  Like a collection of short stories in a novel.  Should be interesting at the very least!  So what're we waitin' fer?  Let's get it ON!!

NOTE:  As I finish each one, there will be an update to include the next...until all my little "mini-post-its" are finished.

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Electronics

This section does NOT cover computers or their products...those deserve their own section.  This one will be large enough, all by itself, believe that.

I don't know if you remember when TV's were only available in two types...too big and bulky, or too tiny to view from any further back than 5 feet...when the VCR was all the rage, or when clock radios and Walkmans were $40 or better.  It didn't matter what the price, the electronics department of ANY store had always held a big interest for me.  I would boldly and purposefully stride directly to it, no matter what store I intended to inhabit.  I did not tread into any store, sans that department, unless I had no choice in the matter (i.e., if I needed food, or had to get clothes; those were about the only exceptions).  My best friends were Best Buy, Office Depot, Sears, Target, Montgomery Ward, K-Mart and Wally World.

Oh, nothing's changed...or at least the fact that this is still my favorite department anyway.  No, what DID change were the products lining the shelves of these once great stores.

I'm not sure just how long it was that the tube TV was the only option you had, but it seemed like decades, easily.  They first came available in the 50's, and didn't disappear until 2000 and beyond...50 years.  The VCR lasted what, 30?  Stereos with record players (non-78's) enjoyed a very prosperous length of time in our history.  Then BAM.  All of a sudden, things that had made it a minimum of 30 years or more, were replaced with things that didn't last more than a single decade or so.  And keeping up?  Fahgetaboutit.  Not possible, by any standard.

The VCR was replaced with the DVD player.  I remember when that came out, they were a MINIMUM $200+.  CD's replaced cassettes and vinyl records.  Oh, I adapted, when I could no longer stand it, and believe me, I held out as long as I could.  Then, about the time my collections were above and beyond what I'd boasted with records and VCR tapes...it changed again.

Sure, the change had been a while in coming.  We still enjoy CD's.  They don't really put out the players like they did, but we can still play them.  In our DVD-Dual Layer Writers (If you have one in your computer that is) in the better portion of our cars, and if you're really sentimental, you've still got a boom-box with a CD player still lying around in your basement.  They're not Frisbees yet.  The one that made me mad was Blue Ray.  Not even a decade, and our DVD movie collection was worthless.  I can't sell the damn things for more than a dollar anymore.  Just as I was finishing up my desired DVD collection, out it came.  What gets me is, DVD's, if the choice is available, are still just as expensive as they were when Blue Ray's came out.  And Blue Rays, unless they're a crummy title that isn't selling, are still just as expensive as they were when THEY came out.  Most of all, the way technology is moving, in full-throttle, Blue Ray doesn't look good for longevity either.  I quit.  I no longer buy movies, or music either.  I watch the videos on Vimeo and YouTube for music, or wait for it to hit Netflix or Redbox to watch the movie.  If it's Epic, I MAY shell out the 20 bucks it costs to put a date and myself into a movie theatre seat, but it had best be something I'm dying to see, RIGHT NOW.  What's the point?  I get the collection going, and they're gonna change it right in the middle of my collectibles anyway!

But the biggest sponge of my wrath would have to be Flat Panel TV's.  This one irritates me like no other. In company with these, computers and cell phones are competing for 2nd place on my hate list.  Just as I'm re-adjusting the wiring to make it look good, and just find the perfect place in my living room for it, my TV is obsolete.  First, it was Plasma.  Then by the time I could afford that, it was LCD.  Then it was LED.  Then it moved to Smart LED.  HD LED's. Smart HDTV's.  3D LED's.  Smart 3D LED's.  Smart HD 3D LED TV's.  Some had Active 3D, some had Passive 3D.  Now, there's ULTRA HDTV's, with Smart and without Smart.  Cruising around, I found some with sticker prices that exceeded $10,000.  That's almost a CAR FOR CHRISSAKES!!  The description on that baby?  LG 84" (there was one bigger, a 90"...who has room in their living room for a 90" TV?  For real?), Cinema 3D 4K Ultra HD 240 hz. LED/LCD (huh?) HDTV w/Smart TV & 6 pairs of 3D glasses.  Wow.  $11,997.99.  Down from $14,000.

Oh, but I'm not done.  Noooooo...on that very same web page, there was one more...at (get this) $39,000.  Down from $44,000, this TV was dirt thin and on a swing of some sort...and the only differences I noted were micro-dimming (?) and Smart TV...with voice control.  The Rolls Royce of flat panels.  Who knew?  I bought a 39" LED, used, but still in the box, made by the least respected maker, and said SCREW ALL THAT!!...for $150, off of Craigslist.  I'm happy as a clam, tankyooberrymutts.  Enough of that...on to:

Furniture

Here's one that makes me want to fill the space between my ears with hot pudding.  Homemakers.  Nebraska Furniture Mart.  Lebeda Matress.  All of these places charge you millions of dollars above any value the furniture they sell, could possibly have.  These are prices I wouldn't charge for antiques!!

We had the extra money once, and bought a solid maple 4-poster bed, with almost the best mattress they had, thinking we would have it for an eternity.  We paid $2600 for the bed and the bedding for it.  A year and a half later, my home was STOLEN FROM ME...(Oh, I'll tell you that sad tale someday, rest assured)...and we had to sell the bed to survive.  I put it on Craigslist at $1600.  After a scam, (you know the one..."Ill buy it, but I'm out of state, I'll send you a check for $1000 more...deposit it in your bank immediately, then send me whatever money you don't use after you ship it"...and you get a Fed-Ex envelope, legal size, with nothing but a check in it, written to you from the account of some person in a different state...as if) then absolutely ZERO calls, I lowered the price down to $1300, $1200, $1000...then finally $800.  I sold it at $800.  $1800 less than what I paid.  Nice, eh?  Someone needs to tie a noose around the CEO's of all furniture companies.  If you made the quality of furniture you did when it was made by hand, and, maybe, after it lasts for 30 years?  I might buy another set at YOUR prices...sheesh.  Might just as well buy it at Wally World.  It lasts just about as long and is 55-75% cheaper.  Might be plain jane, but hey.  And you can't trust anything used anymore, what with the resurgence of bedbugs.  YUCKY!!  And what we have here?  OH NO IT'S...IT'S...

Cars & Trucks

EASILY my FAVORITE of all American Consumer categories, we have the massive collection of vehicular splendor that lines our streets, are parked illegally everywhere, pump more pollutants into the air than just about anything else we've created (that isn't a factory), and threaten to use up every drop of our planet's stored resources, in one fashion AND another.

It used to be that we were concerned about our environment.  I'm not sure when that ceased to BE a concern, but with the economy the way it is, everything that isn't a commodity or concerns people making more cash than they've ever dreamed of has been moved to the bottom of every list.  So, let's not worry about car-pooling or maybe taking public transportation to save our atmosphere and the very air we breath, let's just make sure to sell every person, in every household, who has a driver's license - a vehicle.  And not just a collection of steel and rubber (or plastic, computers and rubber, nowadays), no, we now have vehicles that could well carry a sticker price that rival the prices of some houses I've considered purchasing.

The price of brand new cars when I was 16 and thinking about getting my first one?  About $5,500.  The average price today, some 50 years later?  $31,500.  But with what they use to make cars these days?  I'd MUCH rather have the 50 yr. old muscle car that still runs on regular gas, and that only gets about 12 miles to the gallon, on which I can fix anything for $50 or less in about 5 minutes, with a 3/8 wrench and a flat head screwdriver.  These also had the added bonus of getting into serious wrecks and walking away with their engines laughing it off, like they'd just bumped a curb.  Oh, but wait.  The price for the same car I looked at with a $5,500 sticker price on it, back in 1976?  They want $50,000 for that car today.  SERIOUSLY??

And, if it ended there, I would be only miserable and broke.  No, even worse yet, when you crack the hoods of these vehicles, small intestines begin to look easier to navigate.  There are even car makers now that say if you do anything to your car besides pump it full of fluids or air up your tires, your warranty is null and void. This includes helping that poor 80 yr. old guy out, on the side of the road, by attempting to jump his car.

One thing I've always loved is the depreciation of today's products.  Cars?  The number one example of American gullibility.  Let's say you get that "average sticker price" on a new car, $30,000.  That new car loses 11% of its value the minute you leave the dealer's lot - over one tenth  of it's value.  Americans consider this "a fact of life".  It is NOT a fact of life!!  It's a fact of American Life, maybe!!  Then, it loses $5,500 more - in the FIRST YEAR!!  After 5 years of driving today's car, your car is now worth 63% less than the sticker price you paid in the beginning.  Absofreekin'lutelyunbelievable.  If this doesn't prove the existence of 306 million Sheeple in our country, NOTHING does!!  I want you to look me in the eye, and tell me today's Ford Focus is still going to be in the showcase window 50 years from now, selling at $50,000.  I DARE  you.

Then there's the cost of fixing them.  Even new, you pay a deductible.  If you lose your warranty (usually after 5 years or 100,000 miles, whichever comes first), and your transmission goes out?  You're looking at $12,000.  That's 3 1/2 brand new Dodge Chargers in 1973.  For a transmission.  Oh, but you can fix it yourself, right?  Riiiiiiiiiiight.  Let me know how that works out.  I'll call you in a month, when you finally figure out where everything is that you need to fix.

My favorite part though is the used car business.  Most states carry a lemon law...but it only applies to new cars.  Sure, a shady used car lot will eventually garner bad press and have to close its doors...but let's say I have 20 cars that I bought at auction for around $500 ea., that I now have $2500 sticker prices on.  Most of these have major mechanical issues, but with a $10 bottle of Engine Knock Cure or Radiator Leak Miracle Tonic, I can fix that, no problem.  So let's say I sell 10 of these at $2,500 ea., and they shut me down for selling damaged or unsafe cars.  I spent $10,000 and made $25,000, around $15,000 in profit, after building rental, utilities, etc.  Then, after I'm shut down, I can call the tow company and get an additional $200 per vehicle (if I don't further my deception and sell a few of them for slightly less on Craigslist), bringing my total profit to $17,000 dollars.  I don't have to refund any money (just make sure all of your stickers state "As Is" under the warranty section), I don't have to worry about court servers (I don't have a business anymore...remember?), and you have little or no recourse anyway, sans civil lawsuit, which could take as long as YEARS, then there's no guarantee that shady dealer will pay up.  While he's waiting for his court date, he can go start another lot somewhere else and screw more people out of their hard-earned money. NEXT PLEASE!!

The Pet World

Thank God!!  At least THIS category can be ridiculous and cute, all at the same time!!

So what's the average life of your average pet, usually a dog or cat?  Around 13 yrs.  Almost as long as one of your kids.  And, amazingly, almost as expensive as raising your own kids, as well!!

Let's compare the two.  Kids - you have a birthing cost.  OK, so that one is a freebie for dogs and cats. However, you could feasibly spend from $130 to $2000 depending on the breed.  Let's move on.  Kids - Diapers, shots, baby food, teething rings and toys, a crib, a highchair, a stroller, and baby powders, lotions and wipes.  Puppies and kittens - Training pads, shots, puppy chow, teething chews and ropes, balls, bells, fake mice, cat/dog beds, scratching posts, doggie and kitty food and water bowls, a leash, a collar, another collar for fleas, a harness, a coat, a rain-coat, and warm cover for cold weather, kitty litter, litter box, squeak toys and doggie poop bags.  Prices are pretty competitive between the two industries as well.

This is if you do NOT opt for these things as well:  A kitty scratching post/apartment complex, doggie kennels, Professional dog and cat kennelers, cat carriers, dog and cat groomers, shampoos, Frontline, vet visits and surgeries, pet funerals, licensing fees, dog park fees, leash law violations, doggie poop violations...and the list can go on...and on...and on.

And that's just dogs and cats....*whew*  Shall we? Move on, I mean?  Suuuuuuuuure.

Computers

I love computers.  I don't believe I've ever been all that upset with 'em.  I was good friends with the computer long before most people knew how to even turn them on.  Once upon a time, Office Depot started to kick around the idea of a salesman in the business machines department (the electronics department, in my language). I was one of those salesmen.  By the time I had finished there, I was so adept at computers, I started my own teaching business.

The computer business had started out with a lot of computers being Proprietary, meaning in order to make your current computer better, you would be forced to buy those parts from the company who had manufactured it.  Upon massive complaints from the consumer, however, computer manufacturers everywhere re-invented the PC, making it more generic and user friendly.  Now, you could buy parts cheaply and put them in yourself.

The Laptop started out pretty much the same as the PC, in that it was very proprietary.  It too took a hit and made things easier on the consumer.  Then, somewhere along they way, they managed to swing back the other way again.   Now, unless you have one built special, with a more generic user OS (like Linux), and because of the severity of viruses and ad ware, manufacturers are once again making their machines proprietary, and unable to be tampered with.  Gone now are the days when you could make your computer as bad as you wanted it to be.  You pay the money for the best, or you save money on a decidedly inferior product.  As for what you have in it, you're stuck with most all of it, with the notable exception being the amount of RAM you have inside.  Now, if your hard drive crashes, you have to either buy another identical hard drive, with the software the laptop came with on it for double the price stores charge for blank ones, or option 2, buy another laptop.  This, of course, is what the industry trusts that you'll choose.  Their bank accounts are counting on it.

So, not unlike the flat-panel TV beef, computers, alongside of cell phones (which are essentially computers themselves now, only pocket-sized) are bettering themselves very nearly weekly.  You may THINK you got it, but you don't, because they're shipping the bigger and badder model as you're ringin' yours up.  Don't try to keep up, you'll kill yourself off trying.

I suppose, what I'm trying to say America, is (like you had no idea), it's all about the mighty dollar.  No one believes in the word quality, or even knows what it means any more.  Cars, computers, cell phones, electronics in general, as well as just about EVERYTHING is expected to fall to pieces in short order anymore.  Why?  Because you don't speak up.  Like sheep, you open our wallets wider and incur larger credit card bills to have the latest and greatest thing, which, of late, really isn't all that great...it's only that the Jones, the Smith's and the Jackson's have one, so now you have to have one too.  And as you fall prey to yet another round of the latest and greatest, big business is meeting up in their boardrooms thinking of how they can make the next thing better, and have it shipped out before six months goes by.  Next thing you know, thanks to the usual rigorous ad campaign they launch, you hear about the new Samsung Galaxy IX making it's way over, and you're already reserving a spot on Craigslist for the old one, at around a fifth of what you paid for it.  It's only money...right?  Sheesh.

The American Consumer, Part the 2nd - The AT&T situation, and its Swift and Calculated Resolution

Hey kids.  Wanna know what ever happened to the evil corporation of A, T, and T, mentioned in my previous blog?  My revenge and resolution of the same were swift and calculated.

I wrote the following letter to the management of the store that handled my sale:

3/22/2014

Around a little more than a month ago, we visited your store.  We were heartily greeted, and served by a gentleman named *un-named* (Sorry, I can’t remember the guy’s name).

He helped us pick out phones, and drew up our contract for us.

Now, when we purchased this service, we were told that, after a quick computerized estimate, that each bill would be around $200 a month.  Looking at my contract, I see that to be the truth.  However, when I signed up, I was told that for each line of service, I would receive a credit worth $100 per line.  I was going to be the only person using the service, but for $100 per line?  I signed the wife up as well, and added a hot spot line.  $300 in credits in all.  There was absolutely no discussion whatsoever about when these credits would appear in my billing.  I was never told anything about how much the first bill would be or that there were extra activation fees.  When he informed me that the bill would be around $200 a month, I balked slightly, and asked if there was any way that this bill could be reduced any...maybe by removing the hot spot from the contract?  He then told me that the discounts I was to receive on my service would not be in place if I removed the hotspot, and that it would reduce the bill as far as the third line was concerned, but would increase the bill back up to around $200 if the discounts were removed.  So no, there was no decreasing the bill.  The salesman then offered me phone insurance.  I looked him  dead in the eye and said these words exactly:  Sure, why not?  It’s not like I’ll have a bill to pay for the first month anyway?”  He smiled, without a word of negation to that statement, and I signed on.

Then, a couple of days later, I started to observe a commercial that said, if you were to activate up to 4 lines of service (of which I had 3), with 10 GB of Data (which I had, but I didn’t really hear that at this time) and that my bill would be $160 a month for 4 lines.  I immediately contacted the store.  The salesperson, looking this up, stated the reason we didn’t get this deal was because of the amount of data we signed up for...10 GB.  Confused, we took this answer and we went home.  Again, the commercial aired, I listened and heard exactly that these folks signing up would indeed receive a shared 10 GB of data.

This time I called customer service.  When I stated that we did indeed receive all the commercial offered, the customer service rep then stated to me that this offer was only good to existing customers of AT&T.  If you watch this commercial (and I have, diligently, over and over again), no place in this commercial does state, say, or show type that says that this deal is only applicable to existing customers.  It also presents itself in such a way that you would believe that you, as a NEW customer, are to receive this offer.  The customer service rep pacified me by offering me a $100 credit.  I believe, now, after having my service connected with nary an attempt at saving my patronage, that this was a payoff to make me look the other way as far as this commercial was concerned.  I took this in stride and continued on.

I received several text messages from customer service on my phone, stating that my bill was available for view, and asked me to contact customer service because of my data overages.  I did at one time contact them, and informed them that I had $400 in bill credits...so why would my data overage matter?  They laughed and I hung up.  Then 4 days after one month of service, I received, in the mail, a letter stating that I owed $220, and if I did not pay it immediately, my phone service would be promptly disconnected.

I looked at my bill online, and it said there that my bill was $532.97.  I was furious.  $200 of this new amount should be our bill.  There was 4 added gigs of service added to our data, at $15/GB, granted...but there’s an additional $60 charged here for what reason, I have no idea.  I called customer service.  I was told that my credits per line would not show for at least 2-3 more billing cycles.  I was told that the first bill is always higher because of activation fees.  I asked about why these things weren’t covered in our sale, she said “I’m sorry, you’re absolutely right, that should be said”...with mention that we might be able to use a split bill payment resolution.  She led me to My AT&T online, and asked me to press the Make Payment button.  It didn’t show a split payment option.  She said this was because I was too new of a customer.  I told her that I wouldn’t be able to pay the past due amount until the following week, and she said that our service would be disconnected by then.  When I mentioned that I didn’t know that our first bill would show up in just a week, and be due in less than another week or so, and that in an exact additional month we would be charged yet another month at the promised $200, the pacification came in the form of “this is all in your contract”.  Needless to say, I discontinued the conversation not long after that.

So, today, you’re going to get two options.  Either you will find a way to turn on our service again, at the promised $160 a month, give us until the date of March 31st to pay our past due bill, then immediately apply the $300 in credits that you promised me on our current due bill of $332.97 (after our service reduction per month, and the additional $60 that shouldn’t have been charged, this figure should actually be $232.97; and after $300 in credits, it should really be around -$68.97), or option 2, you will disconnect my service, wipe out both bills, as well as any termination fees that might apply and I will, today, box up and return all of your equipment to you, after you call.

If you do not honor either of these choices, I will haunt the sidewalks outside of your store from business open till business close every weekend of my 2 year contract, with detailed signs that express everything this store lied to me about and omitted upon selling me your service, and it will, I guarantee you, cost you business, I will also write scathing reviews on every site I can find that concerns cell phones.  I am also a blogger, and because of you, have started a new section on the American Consumer, and have already posted a story concerning your business, and will continue to slam you there as well.  Finally, I plan to bring suit against your company for misrepresentation and fraudulent business actions.  I am a legal student, so be prepared for a fight.  This is no idle threat.

When you decide which option to go with, you can contact me on my new prepaid phone that I had to purchase yesterday, at 515-865-3589 to tell me.  I’ll let you be now, since you now have some work to do.

Thank you.



Christopher Bruce.

Needless to say, I received a call within the hour.  I will be updating this blog with the resolution in a few minutes...hold your breath please...

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OK, and the results are in !!!  I spent a grand total of 10 minutes on the phone and another 15 minutes at the store picketing (I told them they had best decide or I would, remember...I didn't get a single call the rest of the day).  The phones will be back on within the hour, my current bill of $532.87 will be wiped out, the bill will be $160 a month, and the more minor issues will be resolved.  Just goes to show you.  Open your mouth wide enough, and the people who don't hear you will still notice you when they fall into it.  Don't roll over America, STAND UP AND DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!!

The American Consumer, Part Eins - Cell Phones

WARNING:  The reading of this post may cause diarrhea, difficulty in breathing, violent convulsions, and, quite possibly, death.  Yes, it's another one of those hour long posts.  Best saved for times such as the-hour-long-lunch...the weekend, that sorta thing.  I'm really sorry America, some days it's just like that, right?  This particular subject may run into more parts...I'm not sure.  One thing I will guarantee, is that I promise you'll be the 2nd to know about it.

"Ah.  What's that?  New cell phone, eh?  What is that, a Samsung Galaxy S LXIX you got there??  Wow, who would have thought that the number would ever get that high, especially in just 5 short years.  Yeah, I remember back in 2011 when the Galaxy S I came out.  And it DOES have the kitchen sink included with it as well?? Well, I can't say as I'm surprised."

It would seem that the cell phone industry has not only caught up with the Flat Panel TV and Laptop/Pad industry, but passed it running at full speed.  "The Next Big Thing" slogan, which can be heard (and seen as well) as Samsung announces each of their newest phone generations as they appear on the market, would seem like it's being said about every other month these days.  This of course refers to their big seller, the Galaxy S, their entry for an Android competitor to the Apple iPhone.  You just get done plunking down $500-$800 for a new one, and a month later they're already talking about the next one.  The T-Mobile Sidekick, which was the iPhone of the 00's, at least waited two years before re-issuing as a new model.  The new Galaxy S models seem to come out just about the time you're either just done recovering the money back into your bank account that you spent on the last one, or about the time you finally get the older one figured out and are completely comfortable with it.  It also seems to always coincide with the time period directly following your purchase of the very last accessory you need for it (case, home charger, car charger, screen protectors, charger cords for your computer, etc.).

What really irritates me though, is that, even though the industry races along at 4G speed and beyond (noting the expiration time period of the other G speeds we've experienced in our pasts, shouldn't we be at 5 or 6G speeds by now?), the contracts and service that go along with them are either the same or a hell of a lot worse.  And not only do the 4 major cellphone companies still pretty much pull the exact same crap on you as they used to back when they first became a necessary evil, when selling them to you, it doesn't give me a lot of hope.

What takes away even more hope is the fact that we still haven't quite come to the logical conclusion, as yet, that cell phones were, back at their inception, right up to this very day, a luxury item.  They cost about 10 times more legs and arms than they used to even, and still we clunk around in the dark for the money to get them, like we don't have a clue what's happening.

I imagine, oft times, a mental picture of the head of household plowing through the door to his home and, after announcing that Samsung is coming out with the new Galaxy S VI in a couple days, and, since they've only served 6 months of their 2 yr. contract sentence and aren't eligible for an upgrade, they have to pay cash for them.  And, when they realize that they don't really have the $2400 handy to pay for new phones for him, the wife and his 2 daughters, he brings out the "sign here in blood" contracts that require that each member of his family give up his/her soul to be able to get them, so they can keep pace with the rest of the world.  Why do you think that the price of your service has dipped to almost nothing these days?  It's because you more than make up for it when you buy the phones at today's outlandish prices.  You have to practically take out a small loan!  $2400 is pertineer a down-payment on a car, for chrissakes.  A good laptop or pad is oodles cheaper!!

Cell phone companies, along with the cells they sell, have always been ridiculous on their contract service rates and service.  Sprint, the first ones to ever upset me on a massive scale, will never again see me darken their doorway after I got what would be my first contract phone ever, nearly 11 years ago.

Ah yes, I remember it well. 'Twas a winter's day, February 2003, and I was the proud owner of a cell phone, finally.  Sprint was running this great promo, where people with not so wonderful credit were given a cell phone, on contract, with a $125 deposit (this was kind of a fore-runner for pre-paid service, I'm thinking) for a certain amount (I can't even remember what it was...that's how long it was before I ever got on contract again), and as long as the bill remained under $125 a month, your service was safe.  In other words, as long as your bill never went over $125 a month, your service didn't get immediately shut off...which, by the way, happened 5 times in a week's time before I called them and told 'em exactly what they could do - with their contracts, with their phones AND with their crappy service.  This was, of course, long before text messaging would be unlimited, or even a gleam in the eye of the phone company.  Matter of fact, if I remember right, I didn't know anything about text messaging back then, and if I did, I wouldn't have had any idea who else in the world would have had such a similar service that I could have texted.  Nor do I believe, even if I had, that I would have even tried to text them.  "Why" I'm sure I said back then, "would I ever text anyone, especially if I could just call them???"  Funny how things change so very much in a decade.  I don't think I've ever typed so much on so many different things...well, EVER.  Even when I did it for a living.

Sorry...back to the story.  I had it for barely a week, and the phone went dead.  This was, of course, back in the day when plans were pretty ridiculous as far as how many minutes you received, as opposed to how much you were paying.  I think I was on a plan with around 450 anytime minutes, and your evenings and weekends were free.  Cell phones were, of course, still very much a luxury back then.  Ownership was still pretty much a new thing.  In 2003, somewhere around 148 million people had cell phones in the world, which, if you think about it, really wasn't a whole lot of owners.  Now, ownership levels are at around 82%, and 97% for people under 44.  I would have to say however, that of that 97%, I'll bet a good portion AREN'T on contract anymore, and for good reason too.

Moving RIGHT along, I called customer service immediately.  Remember, this was also before the days of 611, so I had to look up the number in the phone book and call them.  If I recall right, my problems with Sprint were rather numerous.  Though not necessarily in this order, I had all of these conversations with them, concerning these problems:  minutes used, information calls, data time use, extra charges and apps I supposedly "signed up for."  I probably had to call customer service just about every time I got a bill to get rid of just about every app I ever tried to use on the older style wireless phones.   After getting my phone service disconnected 5 times in a week, with five subsequent customer service calls to follow each one, I quickly tossed that wonderful Sprint phone in the nearest garbage can after conversation five, and swore that I would never again own a cell phone.  Needless to say, I had no idea that they would become an additional organ on your body in the coming decade.

A couple of years later, I finally gave in, and bought another cell phone.  I went with PrimeCo, an outfit I ran into during my time in Madison Wisconsin.  They were wonderful.  I was in Cell Phone Nirvana.  Then, my other #2 arch-enemy, Verizon, bought them out.  I had already, prior to that, experienced Verizon's wonderful land line service, and was none too happy with the takeover.  Verizon, needless to say, brought a few new ideas (and a higher price) to the table that I didn't rightly care for.  So, their phone, not unlike Sprint's, found its permanent resting place in the garbage as well.  Again, I swore buying a cell phone again would probably be a while off for me.

Not nearly so long as between Sprint and PrimeCo, I once again thought about getting yet another cell phone.  Owning one by this time was very nearly a "necessity" (maybe it's just people my age or older...but is it, or has it ever really been this?), only this time, it was the lure of the "Pre-Paid" Cell phone that brought me back around to it...no, I had most certainly learned my lesson with contract phones.  I bought my first pre-paid phone with AT&T, their "Go Phone".  I had that phone a very long time.  I loved it....and I should have stuck with it too.  I'd still have one of the easiest phone numbers I've ever had.  I noted another company that sported an amount that was considerably less than what I was paying, with a heck of a lot more minutes.  It was then that I became an official Virgin user and dedicated fan.  Little did I know that my #1 arch-nemesis in the cell phone world, the company I swore I would never go back to, Sprint, was the owner of Virgin Mobile.  Had I known that, I would have never even looked at the box.

Around the time that I found out that Sprint owned Virgin....at which time I more or less shrugged my shoulders and said "really?  wow!" and kept on talking like I'd never heard the words, they did me wrong, and I decided I was once again going to go elsewhere.  Prior to that, if I had found out that Hitler owned the company, you would have had to rip the Virgin phone out of my cold dead hands.  There was no way I was giving it up.  This would not, however, be the last cell phone company I would ever lie with, thanks to the invention of the smartphone.

Oh, don't get me wrong.  I tried my hardest to resist.  Had Virgin not finally made me mad enough to give them up once, I would still be on one to this day.  Not quite seeing the need for such an expensive phone at that time, I scouted around for a nice compromise...something between smartphone and flip...and ended up with one of those phones that was an MP3 player, had key driven menu items...and yet wasn't too expensive, one of Samsung's first phones.  It was also pre-paid, and belonged to Verizon Wireless, a company I swore I'd never go back to as well, after the PrimeCo incident.  It didn't take me long to remember why.  I think I might have had that phone for a grand total of 2 months before I was looking to go elsewhere.  I gave them up because they wanted me to pay to access my e-mail.

I ended up with T-mobile.  This time, I was talked into going with their contract service.  I might want to add here, that even though I didn't stick with them long, it wasn't because of their service.  No, it was because I had been on pre-paid for so long and was so dead-set against contracts that I chose the path I did.  I dumped 'em because of the cost for the most part.  Why should I spend $100 a line, with limited data, when there were prepaid phones out there at $45 a month with unlimited everything??  I stuck with the company, I just dumped the contract.  Why I continue to fall for sales pitches for contract is beyond me.  It's usually the phone that sucks me in, it's never anything else, that's for sure.

Funny thing enough, if you just save your money up to buy a super good pre-paid phone ahead of time, you don't NEED A CONTRACT.  Oh sure, if you're a family of 4 or more people, then contract phones are the way to go.  2 or less?  No way people.  When two are both on prepaid, you could, feasibly, get a month's service...for both lines, mind you...for as little as $70 now.  Yes, that was indeed SEVENTY DOLLARINOS.  The most in extra charges?  Tax on SEVENTY DOLLARS.  And that seriously covers EVERYTHING.  Unlimited minutes, unlimited data, unlimited messaging.  And Boost Mobile?  Even includes free directory assistance.  I guarantee that, if you're 2 or less people?  You're paying an average of around $100 on contract.  Per person.  Check into it.  Why the world isn't on prepaid is still a mystery to me.  Usually, I believe it's due to the fact that no one wants to dish out $500 for a phone before they even get the phone turned on.  You just don't understand!!  You're still paying for the same phone people, you're just paying for it in other ways.  Trust me, you're still dishing it out, just not all at once.  Here's a suggestion.  Start saving for that phone now, while you're on contract.  Then when it runs out, buy that Galaxy S4.  Sure, you'll pay $600 dollars for it.  But think about all that money you'll save not being on a contract.  And if you don't like the service??  You just let your month of service run out, sell the phone, and go with another one.  Why doesn't everyone already do this????  Hard to say.  Good salespeople.

Right.  Lying little salespeople.  U.S. Cellular was the next to trap me.  Oh, this is one of my favorites, to be sure.  Normally, when I signed a contract, I had a month's service, easy, before I received a first bill.  Then I usually had around 2 to 3 weeks to pay it.  I signed with them, and they told me exactly what my first bill would be, somewhere around $300.  What they DIDN'T tell me was that I would get that bill in around a week, and only have 2 more weeks to pay it.  Those went to the garbage pile REAL quick.

Then finally, we have the one that's about to go the way of all of my other contract phones.  AT&T.  When I bought into their plan, told me that I could have 2 lines of service for $200 a month.  The phones were "free", as usual (meaning I would be paying for it other ways...this, of course, was a given).  What they didn't tell me was, that my first bill, which of course is usually always higher, would be about S320, and would also be given to me about 2 weeks into my service and be due in another 2 weeks.  Funny how this always seems to slip their minds.  Oh, but AT&T decided to take my pain one step further.  You see, I knew this might happen, sure, but when I signed up....and the ENTIRE reason I even went for it...was because they told me I would receive a $100 credit for each line.  3 in all.  That's $300.  Wow.  I signed.  Bet you have no idea what happened next.

Well, you guessed it.  I got the bill.  I didn't even look at it.  Why bother?  I had $300 in credits, I don't owe anything.  Matter of fact, I was POSITIVE I didn't.  This was because AT&T had been airing a commercial that said you could get 4 lines of service with unlimited calls and messages (like I had), and 10GB of data (like I had), for $160 a month (mine was sold to me at $200).  What they have in small print on the commercial is (evidently...I've yet to see this) is that you have to be a current customer to get that deal.  Huh?  So anyway, I called and complained about it, and they pacified me with yet another $100 credit.  Nice.  Then I get, two weeks later, a letter stating that I now have a current bill for the amount of $520, and that, if I don't pay $220 in 3 days, that my phone service will be terminated.  WHAT???

I looked on the web at my account, and discovered that we had, by five days, passed another billing period (funny how every time I sign up for a contract of late, the billing period is always 3 days away), so that was fine.  But what of the $300 in credits I was to receive?  I called them up, and discovered that our $300 in credits per line of service wouldn't show on our account until the 4th billing period.  Funny how they sorta forgot to tell us about that one.  When I mentioned that to the customer service rep I talked to about that?  Their oh-so-obviously adopted response is now "But it was in the contract you signed, didn't you see that?".  Oh sure, I should know that by now.  But really?  My response to that is "IT'S THE RESPONSIBILITY OF THE SALES REP TO SELL EVERYTHING AS REPRESENTED BEFORE I SIGN".  As a matter of fact, I remember, expressly, saying these words, right in the face of the smiling representative holding the pen I was to use:  "Hey...no big deal, I'll go for the insurance!  It's not like I'm going to owe a bill the first month!"  Did they say a word?  Nope.  They continued to smile during my entire signature.

As I will smile during every 1-800 collection agency call I get after I let the service run its course, and the phones are disconnected.

Now here's the thing that really bothers me the most.  Landline service is dirt cheap now.  It was more expensive, sure, when it was active...but it was nowhere near what we're paying now for cell service.  So why did we move to cell phone service again?  Believe me, I'm looking very hard at reviving my land-line.  The novel convenience of being able to take my phone with me and to make and receive phone calls wherever I go?  Not nearly as novel now, mostly because a.) I just realized that I'm getting about as many calls and messages that only serve to annoy me (i.e., companies in my email and on the web that I was forced to enter a phone number for, etc.) as I used to get on my land line, and b.) because where I used to be able to just ignore people I didn't want to talk to, I can't do that anymore.  Now they blow up my phone because they KNOW I take it everywhere.  At $9.99 - $14.99, it might just be my next move.  Unless of course, they ban all land-lines...it's in the works, from what I'm hearing.  :(