Cops (The Show AND the real deal)

Update:  Since I wrote this article, I had to hitchhike to Des Moines, Iowa, from Sioux Falls, South Dakota, for a two day trial on July 5th and 6th..  In Cherokee, Iowa, at 9:30 at night on the 6th of July, I was on my way home, and an Iowa State Trooper decided to "check up on me" while I was resting in a ditch on the side of the road.  Actually, truth be known, my phone was dead, and I was secretly charging it in an outlet that belonged to the local Shopco...and resting.  I had a great view of the phone from that spot, which is why I ended up exactly there.

The State trooper asked me for ID, which of course, I provided.  He asked me if I would sit in the back of his vehicle while he checked me out...and I, essentially, told him that I would remain right where I was, and asked if I was suspected of some crime.  He digested that unwanted clump of info, and left me where I was.  Upon clearing me with dispatch, he chose to inform me (because I had already told him what I was doing) that hitchhiking was illegal in Iowa.

Now, ignorance of the law, where the police are concerned, is probably my most favorite thing about assholes like this guy.  I've been picked up by sheriffs while hitchhiking for years in Iowa, and taken to the county line, and never once been told I couldn't hitchhike.  Funny enough, I've even been told that it's illegal to hitchhike on the interstate here...and it isn't.  It is stupid (since no one has time to even notice me, let alone will they come to a complete stop from going 100 mph), and I rarely get picked up on the interstate, and, I simply prefer the side highways.

So, to this idiot?  I hereby dedicate this article...oh, and provide him with plenty of law showing him that, technically, it's not illegal in ANY fashion to hitchhike in Iowa....oh, and of course, send his station a personal copy of this article.  By the way, another quick note, I politely inquired of the Cherokee State Patrol station for a general email to send it to them, and she very nicely gave me the lieutenant's personal email.  Sweeeeeeeet...:D

(Another quick) Update:  For those of you who want to see that law, here it is, already researched for us by the great folks at www.hitchwiki.org:

Law

Iowa's state law is very friendly towards hitchhikers. The state of Iowa appears to be aware of police constantly abusing the uniform vehicle code's wording of "roadway" to intimidate hitchhikers into thinking hitchhiking is illegal. The law now expressly notes that it is completely legal to hitchhike off the traveled portion of a road:

321.331 Pedestrians soliciting rides.

1. No person shall stand in a roadway for the purpose of soliciting a ride from the driver of any private vehicle.

2. Nothing in this section or this chapter shall be construed so as to prevent any pedestrian from standing on that portion of the highway or roadway, not ordinarily used for vehicular traffic, for the purpose of soliciting a ride from the driver of any vehicle.

This means that if you stay on the shoulder, you'll be fine. Police will still occasionally stop you to check your ID, keep in mind that you do not have to show ID if you're not in breach of any laws (but better be sure about it because insisting on your rights, while a good thing, will likely piss the cop off).

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Hey America...Yes, I'm still alive.  Else, I wouldn't be here, writing this article, one I've been thinking of writing for a long time.

Whaddya say we talk about this show first.  "Cops" has several distinct records that a lot of you are too young to know.  For one, this was THE ORIGINAL reality show...the daddy of all stupid TV.  It also has the distinction of being the longest running reality show.  You ready for this?  30 years.  Who knew?  Funnier still, Jerry Springer is running a hot 2nd, with 26 years under his belt.  If this doesn't say something for ratings and what people spend their time watching, nothing does.  I shake my head for America, nearly every day.

The reason I would like to pick on this show should be obvious.  I don't really much care for cops - the show, OR the real thing.  Most are morons, most are lawbreakers, and most literally get away with murder, because we Americans allow them to.  I'd like to, now, go into all the things that I just know the majority of us, even briefly, allow to cross our minds as we watch this idiotic show; as well as go over what USED to be our rights (and still are) in dealing with these lawless butt-heads.

The very first thing that entered my mind when I watched this show was multi-pronged in its brilliance:  Here's a great idea...put a show on the air that puts the fear of God into evil-doers everywhere, by showing them what'll happen to them if they continue to break the law; with a rather dark side benefit...at the same time, why don't we show the criminals and would-be criminals of our country what to do in order to commit crimes, and give them more to work with; like showing them how to avoid cops, how to break into places, what tools to use, keep everyone up on the latest drugs, how to lie to the police, and how to get on TV, even if you do get arrested.  America loves her 15 seconds of fame, I'm certain that, upon hearing the show was coming to town, the criminals were probably lining up to get arrested, just so they could be on TV.  According to the show's stats, 95% of the arrested criminals sign releases offered to them to be shown on TV, prior to being hauled off for whatever reason.  Nothing like instant fame, rather than anonymity.  What stupid people.

Another thing you might notice, is that, when speaking candidly to the camera before an interaction with their perps, the boys in blue, khaki and black are prim, proper, and can do no wrong.  The thing I love is that almost every one of them fits a narcissistic profile; and if they don't seem so while they're talking to the camera before a bust, by the time they're finished putting on the handcuffs, they fill those shoes to overflowing.  I can't even count how many times I say the words "Bastard" and "Bitch" during the course of a half\-hour show.  I know I often feel very sorry for their unwitting bustees.

Now, let's move right along to my favorite part, what it is that cops can and can't do, and what they know, and, quite obviously, don't know.  What they do do is break the law and infringe upon our rights, nearly every single minute of just about every single shift they work.  As to what they know, they obviously know how to mess with people, how to hassle citizens, how to discriminate, how to act outside of their boundaries, and how to arrest people.

What they don't know is the law.  What do I mean by that?  That, as well, should be obvious.  They do not learn the law...and therefore, do not actually know what the laws are.  What they know is what keeps them in their jobs, and not much else.  They know how to entrap speeders, they know all the latest drugs, they know that girls can't sell their bodies on the street, and they know that people can't steal things that don't belong to them, or that they can't hurt or murder others.  They know how to chase people at high speeds that don't want anything to do with them, and they know how to sick dogs on people, often for no good reason.  They sure as hell know how to shoot those who run from them...even, sometimes, those who don't.  Most of all, they know how to harass Joe Public, using any excuse, and any lie they can use.  They know how to look the other way when a Mercedes Benz drives 70 miles an hour in a 35 mile per hour zone, and stop a black man for any reason he can think of.  This is about the extent of a cop's legal training.  Ask any cop the law behnd whatever it is that he's arresting you for, besides the obvious, and you're likely to get your head slammed into his car for being a smart-ass.  The truth is, for most of what you're arrested for, they have no idea.  They do know what brings in the bucks for the city, county and state, and they know what keeps them in their jobs and collecting their paychecks.  Most of all, they know how to make their expected arrest and ticket quotas, by slacking in the middle of the month, then running up the numbers massively at the end of it.

For good examples, all day long, all you have to do is watch an hour of "Cops", and pay only slight attention.  Make it a point to write down the things you see that you feel aren't quite right, and look up your local laws - statutes, codes and the like, before you actually decide that those punks got what they deserved.  Imagine yourself if the same position, and what you see will actually start to look pretty crazy.  Don't think about what you're seeing the criminals doing, think about what should \be their rights.  Then compare what you're seeing to our Constitution, and its FEDERALLY MANDATED over-bearance over State Law.

But, since a lot of you don't have that kind of time, let me help you out, as I often do.  Let's begin with the reasons that a lot of these people are pulled over for.  Where the show is concerned, you have to take a moment to realize that the show is often very selective of the situations that air.  Often, the people you see are, indeed, lawbreakers, usually of the especially nasty variety.  I guarantee that none that are obviously NOT guilty are rarely aired.  We couldn't have that, it would defeat the purpose; of the show, as well as a cop's actual job.  I can most certainly guarantee that there will never be any confrontation or arrest that ended in a serious shooting injury or death, whether right or wrong.

That said, the police on this show almost always verbalize their purpose of pulling these people over, and almost every one of those reasons sounds ludicrous.  Fortunately for the show, and the cops involved, by the time they've got their men/women pushed into their waiting black and white limos, you've all but forgotten those reasons, due to the fact that the people they've arrested have made it quite apparent that jail is the best place for them.  The real story is, if you took a moment to consider how they're being treated, then put yourself in their shoes, you wouldn't feel the a single right provided you by the Constitution was being considered - mostly because they aren't...being considered.

While writing this article, a show just happened to be airing, reminding me that it had been quite some time since I've written anything.  The reason for this is tri-fold; first, I'm working good long hours, more than I have in years, thanks to the great jobs with high pay they have here.  2nd, is that I'm hard at work at my case, the trial for which you have seen the flyer for already.  Third, I don't have a steady or reliable internet connection where I live.  All of these things will either change or settle down as things continue to get better for me (as they ALWAYS DO the minute I leave Iowa).  Anyway, I usually don't have to wait long before rights are oh so obviously avoided or trampled on, so many in fact that, from this point on, we're just going to tell you about these violations in sections that describe the way to handle your every day stops, organized into their appropriate catagories.  This section applies to both those actually committing crimes, or those that are just simply minding their own business, and are just being harassed, or aren't really committing an actual crime.

If you're being told to stop walking and confront an officer:  and this is very important to remember - unless you are committing a crime, or are suspected of committing a crime (they will use this against you if they feel that's what it takes to win out against your rights by the way...there'll be some sort of story about a guy who looked just like you that committed a crime in the neighborhood, or something similar), you do NOT have to stop, interact, show ID to, or answer any cop's questions.  This is the one that drives me the craziest when watching the show...if these people would just simply tell the officer to buzz off, or just shut their mouths, this show would be a real flop.  There would be almost no arrests either.  But because we are of the firm belief that, because we are being hailed or stopped by someone looking to serve and protect the general public, we must do so, then give up all of our information and confess our crimes, or things will not go well for us.  This is, of course, pretty much the truth; but what you don't get is, if you stick up for yourself, and know what these pretender keepers of the law can actually do, aside from you stupidly giving them permission to do so, you'd beat every case you incur, including traffic offenses.  Cops are NOT allowed to detain you...unless you are in the commission of, or are suspected of committing an actual crime.  What's more, another thing you'll notice about this show is that almost all offenses these days are jailable, or able to be made so; thanks to the absolute ridiculousness of our State and local codes and statutes, that almost all seem to favor and protect the cop, rather than the rights of the citizen.  Hardly ever, unless it's a traffic related offense, do you ever see only a ticket or citation given out anymore...and even that's not entirely true.  Do it right, you can almost bet on going to jail for a good portion of driving offenses as well, these days.

All I can say is this:  Almost every question a cop asks you can be answered quite simply - "None of your business"...mostly because most of what they ask you really isn't their business.  If they ask for your ID when all you're doing is walking along the sidewalk, tell them to quote the state law that requires you to show it to them.  This will, of course, piss them off; but let's be honest...is there some state law that requires that you show these nosy people your ID?  I bet not.  If there is, I suggest you get moving on getting it changed...because it is most certainly unconstitutional.

Now it's important that we move on to moving around, whether on a motorized or non-motorized vehicle that belongs to you or not, matters not; mostly because these things apply to everyone now, pedestrians and drivers alike.

If you are being stopped, it is unconstitutional that you are being forced to pull over and stop anyway.  Unfortunately, we Americans allow these guys to get away with this behavior, so it's a given that, if you don't stop, the cops will do anything and everything to make sure that you do, including killing you.  So I wouldn't tell you, even a little, not to stop, because your life depends on you stopping, whether it's truly unconstitutional or not...which it is.  What I will tell you is, once you have stopped, that's where it ends.  You've stopped.  And, this is, regardless, all you have to do, BY LAW.  You do not have to talk, you do not have to show your driver's license.  If you want to, go ahead...but for God's sake, end it there.  Insurance, registration, all that other stuff, does not have to be shown.  Neither do you have to say a word.  Most of all, cops do NOT have a right to pull you out, or make you get out of your vehicle, search you or your vehicle, or any of that stuff...unless of course, you give them permission to...which of course, almost everyone does, whether they're doing something wrong or not.  Watch the show, and notice that, at almost no time, does a cop say that you are required to get out of your vehicle so that they can search it or you.  Most of the time, you'll hear them ask if they can search the car...as to searching you, they don't usually do that unless you are in cuffs.  Nowadays, you'll notice that, quite often, the cops put the people that have vacated their cars in cuffs, saying at the same time that this is for THEIR protection.  This is really for the purpose of having you in cuffs before they find the things they wouldn't have the right to search for or find, when they do search your car.  In court, just the fact that you got out of the car would be enough for a judge to find that your rights were not violated, because you contracted with the offending cop by voluntarily exiting your car...because now you've essentially given them permission to search it by vacating it.  Searches of you or your car are deemed illegal if you say "NO, I'd rather you didn't search my car, thank you". instead of "Sure", and  "No problem officer.", then get out.  I often laugh to myself as I watch these offenders then get upset, either by crying or getting angry when they realize that they actually found the pound of weed under the seat, or, funnier still, then act like they have no idea it was there, then deny ownership or knowledge of the offending substance.  If they had only known what I'm telling you, the cop would have never gotten past the front window.

Anyway, back to the reasons these people pull you over, especially while you're driving, I cannot believe that a majority of you believe that these are valid reasons for telling these bastards your whole life story, then inviting them to search you and your vehicle; but that, as a viewer, you aren't completely insulted when you hear these cops verbalize the same reasons.  I hate to tell you folks this, but I don't care if your headlight is out, this is not a valid reason to pull you out of your vehicle and search you.  Not having a license to drive is not a reason to tow (and, of course, search your car...they do this, because they state that, because you have been arrested, you can't abandon your vehicle, so they have the right to tow it, since there's no one to drive your vehicle back to where it belongs...and, since it's about to be in possession of law enforcement and in inpound, for their protection, they now have, conveniently, a right to search it, since it's going to be held on their property), this has, in the past, at best, been only reason for a ticket.  That's it.  Turn signal is out, changing lanes without signaling, these are citation offenses.  Same with license being suspended, or no insurance.  There is no reason for arrest here, nor is this permission to search your person or your life.  If you forgot your license at home you aren't arrested, you're only supposed to be given a ticket...the court will later decide your ability to drive in the state, and will fine you if they find that you don't or didn't.  But because they ask....and you say or believe that you have to if they do ask you, or order you to, you do it...then get arrested for what is and what should have been an illegal search of you and your property.

I'll say it again:  just like drugs...just say NO.  It is none of that cop's business why you're driving at night in only your underwear, no you can't search me, no you can't search my car...and, by the way, it is unconstitutional to make you give a breath test...unless of course, you agree to it.  Yes, there are now STATUTES that say, if you refuse a breathalyzer, you are arrested and, and automatically guilty of drunk driving...but guys, you can beat this in court!  This is illegal as Hell, and you know it.  Unless you are killing someone with your two drink breath, you are not breaking a law...not a REAL law, anyway. Only an un-Constitutional one.  Speed traps, drunk stops....the only way these people get away with this is because you allow them to.  This used to be a little crime called ENTRAPMENT...but we the people have allowed cops to bend the rules, probably a little at first, then, just like everything else that has to do with what these people call "the LAW", has gotten way out of focus, context, and has gotten absolutely UN-lawful in its execution.

I get as angry as is humanly possible when I see people get pulled over for having no license plate light, or for some other idiotic citation offense, then getting arrested for nothing that was being done, until, of course, they told the cop to go ahead and search his car and himself while in possession of an ounce of crack and a gun in his waistband.  I don't care if you just shot up an ounce of coke, and feel guilty as Hell...if you tell the police NO to a personal and vehicle search, and they do it anyway, you have already beat your case, due to illegal search and seizure.  I know it doesn't appear like they know this...but they do.  Oh, they're slick as shit.  Every once so often, I marvel at their ingeniousness at getting permission to search these people or their vehicles...but even though it might seem like it's an order...I don't care how well they mask it, it's almost always as close to asking as it can be, because it has to be asked, and you must, in any fashion, agree, or contractually agree, in legal terms.  Ordering you to comply to a search violates your most valuable right, per the 4th Amendment, though it's obvious that most don't know it.  Now you do, if you didn't before.

Oh, oh...but my very MOST favorite part of this show is when a cop asks the perp why he/she/they ran.  This is where I almost always stop to shout at the screen "Look at how you treat the majority of us...and you wonder why I'd rather try to escape??  Or, I guess it's preferable that I allow you to humiliate me, violate my person, my rights and my property, then throw me in the back of your police car, or better yet, pound my head into the cement first...then take me to jail, no matter what I say or do, no matter whether I'm guilty or innocent.  Hmm....I think I'll choose RUNNING Alex!"

You folks watch this show flippantly...and do not stop to think about what's really going on out there, or how you'd act if these law-keepers were to ever confront you.  You would think, after watching this icing on a non-existant cake, that cops are great people who keep you safe...and you'd be right...at least, until you are pulled over in your car on the basis that you are in a "High Crime Area"...a new and quite ridiculously unconstitutional "probable cause" for detaining you while these cops violate your person and your property these days.  Until it happens to you, cops are great, and the show is great, in your opinion...and it always is, isn't it?  What it really is, America, is a blatant and insidious violation of just about everything the Constitution grants you rights for.  It doesn't apply to you, as you never get in trouble with the police...yeah, I've heard it before, literally thousands of times...but there will be a day...and when it peeks over the horizon, don't cry to me.  All you'll get out of me is an "I told you so" and a token shrug of my shoulders.