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Now, it's time to move on to my favorite of all the deadly sins, Lust. Lust, as defined, is simply an intense desire for something. Or someone. However, Lust, unbeknownst to most, is not only a sin of the flesh, other things can be lusted after as well, such as power, money or fame. Well hey, no shortage of lust around these parts then, eh?
Just for something a little different., though, I just thought...since it's obvious that we all believe that lusting after one another is the biggest side of lust, that I'd do just a little digging into what might just be causing this little overdose into one of the more deadly of our sins.
Our number of porno-style magazines we herald as being our biggest most widely purchased mags? Around 42 well-known ones. Human trafficking is horrendous in our country...as well as with Americans traveling to other countries. The average age of women in the U.S. to enter prostitution? 13. Men? 12. Video and Internet porn and prostitution are among the largest money-making professions online. Gee, maybe that's it, right? As for the ages we're introduced to sex, well, for most, there isn't a number anymore.
As for lusting after power, you know we can't be beat. Money? Ask Greed and Gluttony if they're not getting enough to feed on in our country; you should get a goodly chuckle. Fame? Illegal or not, you know us Americans just LOVE the spotlight.
I dunno about you all, but I fear for the safety of every new generation more and more with every passing decade. Humans are getting more and more destructive, more lustful every year. It's not dog eat dog anymore, it's dog consume, boil, hang, electrocute burn, and stomp-on dog these days. It's no good anymore to just ruin others or bring them down, we have to utterly destroy them too, or its just no fun anymore.
Wow. I can just SMELL that fire and brimstone mixing with my burning flesh....Mmmmm....YUMMY.
Well, really though, I feel this is just one of those sins that we can make fun of; in only just a little, just to shake off that doomy feeling, huh?
Since men are the worst offenders of Lust, just for fun, here's a little test you're more than welcome to take if you really want to know if you are, indeed, a lustful individual.
1. If, late at night, as you start thinking about your neighbor's wife, your best friend's girlfriend, or Jesse's girl, do you:
a. Burn yourself at the stake for even thinking such thoughts, or
b. Molest yourself anyway. You might have said no, but you knew you wanted it...
2. Your dog is:
a. Your best friend, or
b. Your last resort
3. The number of sexual partners you've taken part with since the beginning of time is:
a. 1 or
b. 2 or more.
4. The perfect music for seducing my partner is:
a. Glenn Miller or
b. Nine Inch Nails
5. I would describe an orgasm as:
a. The frooits of the Deveel, or
b. The most incredible thing or feeling that I have ever experienced.
6. The best position I've ever held at any job was:
a. The sitting up-right position as an Accountant for Microsoft, or
b. The 69 position as Office Gigolo for Accounttemps
7. Your children should be allowed to date at age:
a. 51 (After you're dead)
b. 15 (As long as they practice safe sex)
8. Select the line that best describes how you feel about sex:
a. I have to know a person well and date them for a couple years before I can have intercourse with them, or
b. I have to know a person can breath before I can have intercourse with them.
9, When I was younger, I strived to:
a. Know every verse of the bible, or
b. Masturbate to images of all my female relatives and neighbors who even looked in my direction or with every item in the house that was soft, furry or warm and fuzzy.
10. When I'm downtown on my lunch hour I:
a. Drool over the amount of meat and veggies in my Subway sandwich, or
b. Drool down the blouse of every women within 5 feet of me showing cleavage as they walk by.
If you answered 5 or more questions with the letter "b", you are a sick twisted pervert who shouldn't be allowed to roam free in public anymore. You should immediately turn yourself in to the nearest office for sexual predator processing.
If you answered 3-4 questions with the letter "b", you are in serious trouble my friend. I would suggest hooking up with a sinfully plain/ugly therapist on the double before you burn in Hell.
If you answered 1-2 questions with the letter "b", you haven't gone too far as yet, but you can bet it wouldn't take a gorgeous or sexy member of the opposite sex long to take you where obviously desire to tread.
If you answered all the questions in this test with the letter "a", breath a huge sigh of relief, you are saved. However, I would seriously question yourself as to why you felt the need to take this test at all if you were well convinced of your absolute purity in this matter (??).
That's it for the fun deadly sin today. See you soon!! :D
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